Cocaine removes feelings of anxiety, and you feel invincible.
It’s an ego boost.
A temporary fix from, sometimes crippling, anxiety and insecurity.
Women exclaim:
“The orgasm gap is mens’ fault!”
“Men need to be better in the bedroom!”
“Men are incompetent lovers!”
and so on and so forth.
Many men are insecure. Feel impotent in the bedroom. Fearful of performance. They crave the orgasm and connection, but secretly dread the sexual act and the risks of “failure.”
A woman’s orgasm offers a man solace in the midst of his sexual shame.
It’s a moment of recognition for him. It’s validation.
He’s not like other men.
He’s better than other men.
He can make her happy.
He’s valuable.
He’s appreciated.
He’s desirable.
And so begins his quest for his next “hit.”
The hit of his erotic cocaine. The “elusive” female orgasm. The source of his value as a man.
And although it temporarily serves women, the dark side of this drug starts to seep in.
She feels obligated to cum.
She feels like she’s being used for her orgasm, to make him feel good.
He’s putting in so much effort to try to make her cum, that he loses touch with his own body.
He starts to struggle with performance anxiety.
He cums too quickly.
He can’t get hard.
He can’t seem to just “get into the groove” with her.
He doesn’t even know what “pleasure” is like in his own body.
His pleasure is reduced to “ejaculation”, and the result? The essence of sex is lost.
It becomes a chore. A task. For both partners. Her orgasm, and his ejaculation are a momentary blip of bliss, followed by a lingering hunger not fully satiated.
Until her next orgasm. And his next ejaculation. Followed yet again, by attempts to ignore the never quenched, and ever deepening thirst.
The yearning for more slowly fills with loneliness, sadness and resentment.
The seductive moans, and screams and cries of a woman in ecstasy, overpower the quiet truth whispering in your gut.
The orgasm, mistaken as the goal, becomes the main vein through which your insecurities leech a temporary moment of peace.
Fulfillment is attained NOT through orgasm.
In the moments of erotic abandon, the ego is lost, and what’s left is your heart and deep sexual connection.
To find fulfillment, requires letting go of the need to cum.
Letting go of the need to make her cum.
Letting go of performance.
Letting go of fear.
Letting go of anxiety.
Letting go of your goal to get your next fix of erotic cocaine.
Instead, simply be sexual. Basque in her sexual arousal. Let her bathe in your sexual energy.
And in the emptiness of no intention, simply allow ecstasy to arise, and begin your journey to god by connection, through your shared experience of erotic pleasure.